Laugh Out Loud: 100+ Funny Birthday Wishes in One Liners

These birthday puns are like jokes, but they’re all about birthdays! Some are really funny, some are sweet and short, and some are so cheesy they’ll make you laugh.

No matter which one you choose, they all have something special in common: they’ll make the person who gets them happy. Whether it’s your friend, girlfriend or boyfriend, or someone in your family, these puns are perfect for making them smile on their birthday.

If you need a quick and funny line to write in a card, or if you want to leave a funny comment on their birthday photos, you’ll find plenty of great ideas here. We’ve collected the 100 best happy birthday puns for you to enjoy!

100+ Funny Birthday Wishes One Liners

• Congratulations on being a year older and still maintaining such a low level of maturity; you are truly an inspiration.
• How do two pickle friends celebrate each other? They relish their birthdays, of course.
• Another year of being a total rock star, happy birthday!
• I can’t believe you’re still alive, congrats!
• Why do kids always forget their past birthday parties? Because they’re so focused on the present.
• Happy Birthday, big guy! Don’t forget to iron the wrinkles out of that birthday suit.
• The secret to staying young is make-up—make-up an age, then stick with it.
• You’re not getting older, you’re just getting closer to becoming a classic.
• Why couldn’t the knot go to the birthday party? It was all tied up.
• What’s the best way to remember your wife’s birthday? Forget it once.
• What will you do if no one comes to your birthday party? You’ll have your cake and eat it, too.
• Happy birthday to one of the only people I can actually tolerate on a daily basis! Well, most days.
• Here’s to another year of questionable life decisions! Happy birthday, rock star!
• Whatever you do, don’t let aging get you down. It’s way too hard to get back up again!
• You’re getting closer to cracking joints!
• What birthday present is guaranteed to make anyone’s face light up? A light bulb.
• Everything in this world has a limit, but my love for you is limitless… most of the time. Happy birthday!
• For those under 40: Although you are not yet over the hill, the view is fantastic!
• You’re not old, you’re just a classic.
• How is a birthday cake like baseball? Both need batters.
• What did the ocean say on its birthday? Nothing — it just waved.
• What do you say to a bunny on its birthday? Hoppy birthday to you.
• Whoever said you can’t teach an old dog new tricks never met you.
• Loving you is a piece of cake. Now, it’s time to eat yours!
• Getting older is a piece of cake (and a few more candles).
• Another year older, wiser, and more like me. You’re welcome. Happy birthday, little bro/sis!
• I hope your birthday is better than the card I sent you…
• Remember, age is just a number. In your case, a really, really high one.
• I just want to say on your special day, thanks for always being older than me.
• What do you sing to a cow on its birthday? Happy birthday to moo!
• It’s your birthday! You’re now a year closer to being that old guy who yells at kids to get off his lawn.
• For the record, you’re not old, you’re a classic.
• They say the older you are, the wiser you become. At this rate, you’re basically Socrates!
• I can only hope to be as great a woman as you one day. But, obviously with better clothes. Happy birthday!
• Congratulations on getting slightly older!
• Happy birthday! We’ll be friends until we’re old and senile… then, we’ll be new friends!
• Don’t forget to smile uncomfortably when the whole family sings you Happy Birthday!
• Happy Womb Emigration Day.
• On your birthday, keep this in mind…you only look as old as your last selfie.
• What famous people were born on your birthday? None — they were all just babies!
• Why does the mushroom always get invited to birthday parties? He’s a fun guy.
• Don’t think of it as aging, think of it as leveling up. Congratulations and here’s to a great year ahead!
• Happy Birthday! I wish you were paid a month’s salary for a week’s work, and that’s how exceptional you are.
• You know you’re getting old when caution is the only thing you exercise.
• Congratulations on your [XX]th birthday, which was 10 years ago today! I wish you many more.
• Why did the birthday girl hit her cake with a hammer? Because it was pound cake.
• You’re not getting older, you’re just getting more distinguished.
• It’s better to be over the hill than under it.
• Happy Birthday to someone too young to be this old.
• Another year of wisdom and wrinkles, happy birthday!
• You’re not old, you’re just a little bit closer to death. Congrats!
• What does an oyster do on its birthday? Shellebrate.
• Happy birthday to the best sibling. I’m so grateful you came into my life to make me seem normal!
• Why did people take off their coats at the birthday party? Because everyone kept toasting.
• I was going to get you the best birthday present ever, but I’m too big for the gift box.
• You’re not getting older, you’re just gaining more experience points.
• Smart, good looking, and funny. But enough about me. Happy birthday!
• What did one candle say to the other? “Birthdays just burn me up.
• I’d be a lot more excited about you turning one year older if I was in your will.
• What did the teddy bear say when asked if it wanted a second piece of birthday cake? “No thank you, I’m stuffed.”
• I’m so glad you were born because, without you, who would I have to make fun of?
• Happy birthday from the one who endures your farts and loves you all the same.
• Cheers to you! May your birthday be as unforgettable as my Netflix password.
• What did the bald guy say when he got a comb for his birthday? Thanks, I’ll never part with it.
• Why do we put candles on top of birthday cakes? Because it doesn’t work to put them on the bottom.
• In dog years you’re dead. Happy birthday to a man’s best friend!
• Have a drink for me on your birthday! Or two…or four!
• Last year your birthday cake looked like a prairie fire! Keep adding those candles!
• Why didn’t anyone say happy birthday to the owl? Because it didn’t give a hoot.
• It’s better to be over the hill than buried under it.
• My birthday wish for you is that your hangover tomorrow isn’t too bad.
• Happy birthday, dear. You are a fantastic friend and coworker.
• Did you hear what happened at the tree’s birthday party? Everyone got totally sappy.
• Happy birthday to the luckiest man/woman in the world. Getting a man/woman like me is winning the lottery!
• We’re both getting old, but who’s counting? Happy birthday!
• Why don’t kangaroos don’t like birthdays? They only get to celebrate them in leap years.
• What does every birthday end with? The letter Y.

Funny Birthday Wishes And Messages

• This birthday, just remember: there’s absolutely no shame in the Botox game.
• May you celebrate this birthday the way you celebrated the first one: naked and screaming.
• Where do you buy a birthday present for a cat? From a cat-alogue.
• Happy Birthday to the only person who is older than me.
• Have you heard? In banana years, you’re ripe enough for bread!
• One minute, you’re young and fun. The next, you have a favorite burner on the stove. Which one is yours?
• Happy birthday. You are an excellent co-worker and a wonderful friend but not more than me!
• Let them eat cake. And by them, I mean you!
• What do you call a birthday bash you throw for a dog? A ball.
• Don’t think of them as gray hairs. Think of them as strands of birthday glitter growing out of your head.
• When is a birthday cake like a golf ball? When you slice it.
• Celebrate your birthday like a cat: by turning up the mewsic.
• What kind of music do balloons fear? Pop tunes.
• Happy Birthday! I would have bought you a gift, but it’s above my sibling pay grade.
• You’re not getting older, you’re just leveling up!
• Happy, Happy Birthday to the “she” to my “nanigans”!
• You aren’t old, you’re a classic!
• Happy Birthday to my partner in crime, let’s make some more questionable decisions this year!
• Happy Birthday to someone who is still hotter than their birthday candles!
• Happy birthday! You’re like a fine wine—getting older only makes you more valuable and smell a little funky!
• Did you hear about the sale on birthday candles? It’s a blowout.
• If anyone calls you old this birthday, don’t worry about it. Just hit him with your cane and throw your dentures at him.
• Like an iPhone, you upgrade each year!
• You’re 60? Only 16 degrees Celsius, then. Happy Birthday!
• If it’s any consolation, in whiskey years you’re just getting tastier. Happy birthday!
• Like the clothes we covet, you’re not old, but vintage! Happy birthday to my shopping partner and bestie!
• I couldn’t think of a message that would make you laugh for your birthday card… you’re too boring…
• What can you do if you get heartburn from birthday cake? Take off the candles before you eat it next time.
• Age [insert]?! I demand a tally!
• What does a witch do on her birthday? Spellebrate.
• Happy beer-thday, bud.
• Happy Birthday to someone who has finally reached the age of wisdom teeth.
• Did you hear about the risk behind birthdays? Yeah, too many can kill you.
• Like cheese and fine wine, you’re only getting better with time!
• Happy Birthday to someone who has survived another year of my shenanigans.
• I hope you celebrate this birthday the way you celebrated the first one: naked and screaming. Happy birthday!
• Why do candles love birthdays? They like to get lit.
• It’s time to get this party started! But seriously, let’s get a move on—we both know you can’t stay up past 10 p.m.
• Some people age gracefully, then there’s you. Happy birthday anyway.
• Happy Birthday, queen! You definitely don’t look a day older than the age you tell people you are.
• You might be prehistoric, but at least you’re not extinct!
• Another year of being fabulous, happy birthday!
• Seriously, I don’t know how many more of your birthdays I can handle.
• You don’t look a day over 16! From a distance, with my eyes closed. Happy birthday!
• May all your birthday wishes come true —except for the illegal ones!
• What did the cake say to the ice cream? “I think you’re cool.”
• It’s your birthday, so let’s eat cake and pretend we’re not getting older.
• I decided to keep having birthdays because it beats the alternative… Death.
• Another year of being awesome, happy birthday!
• You might be prehistoric, but at least you’re not extinct!
• Happy birthday to a guy who continues to defy the effects of time, both in appearance and behavior!
• What kind of cake do you eat if your birthday’s on Halloween? I scream cake.
• Happy birthday! Remember, age is just a number, but wrinkles are real estate for wisdom!
• Happy Birthday! Thank you for the sacrifice of being the older sibling paving the way, and making me look good!
• Another year older… and you still can’t grow a beard.
• I can’t tell if life is passing us by or trying to run us over. HBD, friend!
• A true friend remembers your birthday but not your age.
• Happy birthday to my favorite human pillow! Thanks.
• You don’t look a day over 20. From a distance. With my eyes squinted. Happy birthday, bestie!
• What kind of candle burns longer than others? None, silly — they all burn shorter.
• How do two pickle friends celebrate each other? They relish their birthdays.
• Happy Birthday, old man. So glad you’re still alive and cake-ing!
• How was the birthday party for the fish? It went swimmingly.
• Statistics show that those who have the most birthdays live the longest. You’re doing pretty well!
• It’s fantastic to look [insert age] if you’re sixty.
• Happy birthday to a dude who isn’t showing his age—or acting it, either.
• I assumed you would want assistance with the candles. Happy Birthday!
• Happy birthday to my ride or die! I can’t wait until we’re old enough to terrorize the nursing home together!
• Happy Easter. Christmas. Independence Day. You know what? Just eat your darn cake!
• How hard we make your party tonight will directly correlate to how hard you work today. Happy birthday!
• Happy birthday! You know you’re getting old when you can’t remember how old you are. So, how old are you again?
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• Happy Birthday, dear! You are one year wiser and one year closer to retirement today.
• Happy birthday! You’re not getting older; you’re just upgrading to a version with more ‘wisdom’ and fewer ‘teeth.’
• Birthdays are like vacations: infrequent and fleeting.
• Don’t forget to wear your birthday suit. But make sure you check it for wrinkles first!
• My sincere condolences on your [enter age]th birthday.
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Abby. Abby who? Abby birthday!
• If I made fun of how many years old you are, it would be beyond funny.
• How do you know if a birthday cake is sad? Look for the tiers.
• What song do you sing at a snowman’s birthday party? Freeze a jolly good fellow.
• Older? For sure. Wiser? Not so much. Happy Birthday, bro!
• Happiest of birthdays to the kid who always knows what to say, what to wear, and when to leave the party.
• What’s a bee’s favorite day of the year? Its bee-day.
• Congratulations on being born a really long time ago.
• You’re not old, you’re just young at heart.
• What did one veggie say to the other on its birthday? Ha pea birthday.
• You’re not old, you’re just well-seasoned.
• Happy 29 (again)!
• Birthdays are like golfing — it’s a lot more fun if you don’t keep count!
• Happy birthday to my perfect partner in crime, who makes it possible for me to pretend to work harder.
• Still too young to organize your own surprise party at [insert age]!
• Happy birthday! Here is a piece of card to show you how little I care…
• Happy Birthday, I hope you age like fine wine!
• Age is a matter of mind. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter!
• You’re not old, you’re just vintage.
• You know you’ve hit middle age when your back is hairier than your head.
• What did the birthday balloon say to the safety pin? “Hey, buster.
• Birthdays are just like golf—if you don’t keep count it’s a lot more fun.
• Congratulations on the level-up!
• Why were there balloons in the bathroom? For the birthday potty.
• Congratulations on reaching an age where you wake up at the same time you used to go to sleep on a Saturday.
• Where can you go to study birthday treats? Sundae school.
• Remember that age is just a number…in your case, a REALLY high one.
• Here’s to getting as lit as the candles on your cake today!
• Happy Birthday to someone who is comparable to fine wine and cheese. You just get better with age, lady!
• Happy Birthday to my favorite unicorn!
• Happy birthday and keep up the good work getting older!
• Have a GRATE birthday! (Hope that’s not too CHEESY.)
• I could never picture doing my work with anybody else. Birthday greetings.
• Every day we celebrate you… but today, you get a card.
• Another year of surviving life, congrats!
• What did the elephant want for his birthday? A trunk full of presents.
• Happy birthday, bestie! Here’s a long life together, so we can be 100 and still gossiping like teens.
• Happy one year closer to retirement!
• You’re not getting older, you’re just getting better.
• What goes up but never comes down? Your age.
• You’re the least famous person I know of who was born on your birthday.
• At least you’re not as old as you’ll be this time next year.
• Why did the bakery get robbed? Robbers heard the cakes were rich.
• Older? Definitely. Wiser? Definitely debatable. Happy Birthday!
• It’s scientifically proven that people who have more birthdays live longer.
• Is it hot in here? Must be all the candles on your birthday cake.
• Why did the student eat his homework on his birthday? Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake.
• Happy National [Name] Day!
• I’ve already alerted the fire department, so go ahead and light the candles on your cake.
• Age is just the number of years the world has been enjoying you.
• Did Moby Dick enjoy his birthday? Oh yes — he had a whale of a time.
• You’re not old. You’re simply aged to perfection.

Read Also – Best Happy Birthday, Handsome! Wishes & Messages